WE tend to think of the festive period as a time for celebrations and pleasure, yet for many, it can be a trigger for feelings of loneliness, isolation, and falling self-esteem.

Whether it is concern about January finances, a relationship breakdown, feelings of grief for a lost loved one, or a sense that your life is not going in the direction you would like it to, it is important to remember that you are not alone, and there is help available, says mental health activist John Junior.

John, who identifies as gender fluid, lost their father in 2018, and struggles during the festive period with grief and with their mental health.

In June 2020, the 34-year-old was thinking a lot about suicide when a Hollyoaks storyline helped them so see a way to escape these feelings.

John, from Wilmslow, is in much better place now, and they have shared some tips about spotting when you or someone else is struggling with their mental health, and some self-care tips that may come in handy if you are struggling.

“The most important thing to try to remember,” says John, “is that you are loved, wanted, and needed. Whatever mood you are feeling, it is perfectly valid, but it is also temporary.”

“Signs that may indicate your mental health is declining can be: eating more or less; mood swings; feelings of frustration; low self-esteem; feeling tense or anxious; not sleeping or wanting to sleep all the time; poor memory or forgetting things; excessive drinking and/or drug use; feeling tired and lacking energy; not bathing; and not tidying up/being messy.

“If you are struggling, remember the way you are feeling is valid, and that you are not alone.

“If you are not ready to talk about how you feel, try writing it down. It feels more real when it's written down and in front of you. You can also speak to family and friends for support, but there are also social media accounts online which provide support services.”

"People struggle with expressing how they are feeling for all sorts of reasons. They may be worried about what people will think of them, or fear they may appear weak and unable to cope with feelings that others seem to manage on their own.

“We are all human, and humans express emotions. We feel sadness, grief, and sometimes we cry. This can be especially difficult for men to accept. Today, we are trying to go beyond this stigma and be more open. It doesn’t matter if you cry or get sad. It doesn’t mean you are weak.

“If you are concerned that your mental health is declining, there are a few things you could do that could make a difference to the way you are feeling in the short term. You can: watch a film; meditate; go for a walk; listen to music; have a bath; write down how you feel and that you are in control, that you are okay; stay hydrated; splash cold water on your face.

“Most importantly, be gentle with yourself, and remind yourself that the way you are feeling is temporary.

“In the longer term, develop a self-care plan for yourself.

“Assess your needs: Make a list of the different parts of your life and major activities that you engage in each day.

“Consider your stressors: Think about the aspects of these areas that cause stress and consider some ways you might address that stress.

“Devise self-care strategies: Think about some activities that you can do that will help you feel better in each of these areas of your life. Spending time with friends or developing boundaries, for example, can be a way to build healthy social connections.

“Plan for challenges: When you discover that you're neglecting a certain aspect of your life, create a change plan.

“Take small steps: You don't have to tackle everything all at once. Identify one small step you can take to begin caring for yourself better.

“Schedule time to focus on your needs: Even when you feel like you don't have time to squeeze in one more thing, make self-care a priority.

“When you're caring for all aspects of yourself, you'll find that you are able to operate more effectively and efficiently.

Help and Advice

PAPYRUS is a charity which aims to reduce the number of young people who take their own lives by breaking down the stigma around suicide and equipping people with the skills to recognise and respond to suicidal behavior.

HOPELINEUK is the charity’s confidential helpline service providing practical advice and support to young people with thoughts of suicide and anyone concerned about a young person who may have thoughts of suicide.

For practical, confidential suicide prevention help and advice please contact PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK on 0800 068 4141, text 07860 039967, or email pat@papyrus-uk.org