‘Cheshire East’s supported bus network has delivered value for taxpayers.’ Sounds like a pretty good headline doesn’t it? God knows it’s time Cheshire East Council ‘delivered value’ after the succession of financial disasters its masterminded in recent years.

So how did the leadership of this oft-inept council deliver such a welcome fiscal triumph?

I’d like to say it did it by slashing its own management costs or by getting rid of the so-called arms length companies that limp along like three-legged donkeys. Alas this is not the case.

The council produced this remarkable result for the supported bus network by err...cutting bus services. This is somewhat like Cadbury’s ‘delivering value’ by leaving the ‘creme’ out of Creme Eggs.

CEC has a singularly unique way of measuring value to taxpayers. While the common interpretation among other organisations may be to give more (service) for less (money) the financial wizards who lead Cheshire East deliver ‘value’ by giving less for more.

Hence residents who have paid increased council tax have been ‘rewarded’ by having their bus network slashed.

You may recall how CEC ‘delivered value’ on street lighting by err...switching them off.

You see the clever way in which it’s done? There’s a distinct pattern here no doubt based on a set of finely honed algorithms.

In the topsy-turvy world in which Cheshire East Tories operate, less is more particularly when it relates to council operated services.

The caveat to that is, of course, is internal investigations, lay-offs and consultancy fees for which the algorithms dictate no upper limit.

This current spate of ‘delivering value’ will dictate that those dependent on bus services for their mode of transport will have their movements restricted. Shift workers whose work pattern fails to coincide with the reduced availability of the supported bus network must find their own way to and from work.

I’m not sure how this ‘pay more for less’ policy would work in the commercial world in which the rest of us reside.

I can’t see Ryanair enjoying much success with its ‘improved value’ fairs to Dublin by dropping off passengers on the Isle 0f Man. Or Tesco boasting ‘Every little added on helps (us).’ Basically the Cheshire East philosophy is: ‘Demand more – Deliver less.’ Not a great marketing slogan is it?

WHAT SORT OF MORONS STEAL FOXES?

Like it or not we are fast becoming an urban society. Greenbelt is being systematically destroyed to build homes that will benefit none of those families desperately seeking affordable homes.

Having virtually given away all its housing stock, CEC suddenly find that the strongest demand in the housing sector is for starter homes...the very houses developers do not want to build.

The whole ‘build it and they will come’ policy is a fabrication intended to outfox local communities who believed they were sacrificing their open spaces to accommodate inexpensive starter homes.

In this great land grab it isn’t just vulnerable people who are being squeezed out it’s the wildlife that loses its environment.

When did you last see a murmuration of starlings or hear the call of a skylark? I haven’t seen a song thrush in our garden for years. They used to be common visitors. A lovely field I drive past regularly was once full of rabbits…it’s now full of ‘executive’ homes.

Our wildlife is under enormous pressure as the urbanisation juggernaut rips through their environment. For some species it’s a fight for survival and many will not make it.

Many of our grandchildren will never hear the hoot of a tawny owl or see hares boxing unless they make a special excursion to some distant wildlife reserve.

British wildlife needs all the help it can get and facilities like Lower Moss Wood Educational Nature Reserve and Wildlife Hospital are desperately needed to educate us all and help rehabilitate injured animals and birds.

It is vital work in the survival process so it’s heartbreaking to hear that pens were raided recently and two foxes stolen. I’m not sure why anyone would steal foxes from a safe haven but I’m guessing the intention was not a kindly one.

God knows what will be come of these two animals but I doubt it will be a happy ending.

If you observe cultures around the world you can see that the treatment of animals reflects the respect that culture has for human beings. Those that give no thought to the wellbeing of animals rarely cherish their people.

Thanks to donations, the Lower Moss Wood Educational Nature Reserve and Wildlife Hospital now has much improved security with CCTV monitoring.

It will certainly make this kind of vile crime a little more difficult for the perpetrators but you can’t legislate against morons.

WHEN IS A VILLAGE NOT A VILLAGE?

According to recent press releases, the Garden Village at Handforth is to have 1,675 houses.

Look, I may have led a sheltered life but I have yet to see either a ‘garden or a ‘village’ housing 6,000 to 7,000 residents at one fell swoop.

Surely a more apt title would have been ‘Sprawling Village’?

Am I right or am I right?

By Guardian columnist Vic Barlow